20 Ways for Young Men to Become REAL Men

Here is the list that I referenced in my last blog. Later this week I will post some ideas that the guys share at Bible study, this week we'll be going over #'s 10-20. I got the list from a teacher in New York, she is using the list at an all boy's school challenging them to be REAL Men. A REAL Man today may not look how it should, meaning that the culture tells us one thing when people of any morality know that being a real man is far from what the culture makes it out to be. Unfortunately, Christians are often the only ones defending or standing up for what true Manhood is.

And I wanted to post a picture of Real Men and like a real man I resorted to a search of "real men" and "be a real man" on google image search. Not only was I disappointed but pretty much disgusted, which goes to prove the point above of how poorly our culture portrays manhood. So here's a picture of a REAL Man above.

20 Ways for Young Men to Become REAL Men
1.Read the Bible—be open to God’s Word.
2.Find saints that you relate to and ask them to pray for you as you imitate their virtues.
3.Keep your standards high; only date women who have the qualities you want in a future wife and mother of your children.
4.Tell appropriate jokes, not the kind that would make a pure woman blush—or be offended!
5.Respect women, even those who don’t respect themselves and may throw themselves at you.
6.Be a man of integrity.
7.Be both strong and gentle. St. Francis de Sales said that “there is nothing so strong as gentleness and nothing so gentle as real strength.”
8.Say a prayer when you see a woman dressed immodestly (for the sake of the woman).
9.Say a prayer when you see a woman dressed immodestly (for your purity’s sake).
10.Honor your mother and sisters.
11.Find creative ways to express your (pure & chaste) feelings to the woman you like or are dating.
12.Find good male role models to emulate; get relationship advice from Godly men.
13.Be open to the priesthood.
14.Show gentlemanly respect to all women, not just the woman you’re dating.
15.Trust in God’s mercy. When you fall, go to confession. Receive strength from Christ truly present in the Eucharist.

Blessed Pier Giorgio Frassati said, “With all the strength of my soul I urge you young people to approach the Communion table as often as you can. Feed on this bread of angels whence you will draw all the energy you need to fight inner battles. Because true happiness, dear friends, does not consist in the pleasures of the world or in earthly things, but in peace of conscience, which we have only if we are pure in heart and mind.”

16.Don’t settle for counterfeits such as pornography or masturbation (in fact, avoid them like the plagues they are) if you want to someday enjoy the utterly amazing gift of sex as God intended.
17.Guard your senses from temptation, and be always ready to choose God’s way, no matter what the cost.
18.Recognize Mary as your Mother and say a prayer to consecrate your heart to her.
19.Lay down your life in the little things; practice making small sacrifices by putting someone else’s wants or needs before your own.
20.Make Jesus Christ your best friend and greatest role model.

J.R.R. Tolkien, in a letter to his son, wrote, “Out of the darkness of my life, so much frustrated, I put before you the one great thing to love on earth: the Blessed Sacrament…There you will find romance, glory, honor, fidelity, and the true way of all your loves upon earth…which every man’s heart desires.”

Great Week

This last week, my second back in New Jersey this semester was great!

The week began on Friday the 21st and my 5 teammates, Fr. Gomes and I were taking a group of 45 students to Baltimore for a FOCUS National Conference. Everyone had a blast at Conference which was about 2 days. We listened to some great speakers and were all challenged to deepen our relationship with Jesus Christ. We were challenged to do this in several ways but one of the best ways that was suggested to us was through the Sacraments of the Catholic Church. On Saturday night 2 young women that are from Seton Hall went to confession for the first time in 9 years!! At Conference I had to work the Varsity Catholic information booth and even got to speak with my teammate Melissa about Varsity Catholic to an audience of over 50 people. Conference was also a great chance to catch up with missionaries serving at other schools that I have not seen since this summer and some that I had never even met.

Once Conference ended on Sunday afternoon my roommate Anthony and I stuck around at the hotel to watch the NFC Championship game. The result of the game was especially enjoyable and even more so since we watched most of it with 2 Bears fans.

From Baltimore we went to Washington D.C. on Monday for the March for Life. Last year I went to a local version of the march in St. Paul where I walked with a group from St. Paul's Cathedral to the steps of the state capitol. This year was a little different. This year I marched with over hundreds of thousands of people!! It was beautiful to see so many people united for the same cause, to end legalized abortion. People from across the country made the trip to DC to stand up for all to have the right to life. I was especially impressed by a group that I saw from Green Bay, WI. At the end of the march several of the FOCUS missionaries that were there gathered for a picture, there were about 40 of us. The rest of the day was spent with missionaries out for dinner and the night ended with the Seton Hall team of missionaries in Alexandria, VA. We stayed with Rosabel's (missionary) family.

Tuesday we made the trip back to campus and the rest of the week was pretty irregular. Wednesday I had my 2nd Bible study of the semester, 11 guys made it and we talked about chastity and purity. The guys really enjoyed it and had a lot to share. I'll post what I used to lead the discussion in a later post. Wednesday the school was closed because of the weather and the amount of snow that we were supposed to receive. Well it snowed so much that school was closed for all of Thursday. On a whim we (missionaries) invited over students to hang out and eat. Typically we host a Grilled Cheese Party each Thursday night so for this Thursday we extended that to all day and even threw in some tomato soup. In all probably around 30 students stopped by, it was a long day, but a fun day, what snow day isn't a great day after all?

Today, Saturday has been action packed as well. Melissa and I joined the women's basketball team for their pregame devotion. I watched the first half and then stopped by the swim meet for awhile. Then I got home just in time to welcome some guests. Some guys from the baseball team came over for some pizza and video games. This is their last weekend that they're not in season, so I wanted to get together with them. We had pizza and played some NFL Blitz and NHL Hitz and watched some golf and basketball on TV.

I also made a big decision this week, to go home to watch the Super Bowl with my family, which will probably be the next best place to be besides Dallas next Sunday.

It's weeks like these that really make me thankful for where the Lord has put me and thankful for the work that He is allowing me to do, I love my job!

GO PACK!!

1st Semester

I’ve been home in Waukesha now since 12/18 and since I’ve been here I’ve had a good chance to reflect on my first semester as a FOCUS missionary…………

Its hard to believe that I have been in South Orange for over 4 months already, but I guess it’s good that time has gone so fast. I love my job. Thank you Jesus.

I remember being anxious about moving out east, maybe even intimidated by the idea of being so close to New York City (since I had never been there before.) One thing is for sure…… the east coast is a different world! But I think I’ve adjusted well. Thankfully I’ve been blessed with a great team to work with and 3 of which who were at Seton Hall last year and really helped to make the transition almost painless. I also have 2 teammates that went through the ups and downs of being a 1st year missionary with me.

Along with learning to adjust my lifestyle to the east coast I learned that there are hungry souls on this college campus. Souls that are hungry for truth and willing to seek the truth. There have been a few times that I have sat around campus in random places, but very much public places where I have been appalled at things I have overheard. Students talking about things they did the night before or were hoping to do the coming night. Now I am by no means naïve to what happens on campus having spent the last 6 years on a college campus, but some things I have heard out here have surprised me. And that has made me even more zealous for souls and a given me a greater desire to share the glory and joy of the Kingdom.

I have been blessed with leading young men on the Seton Hall Baseball team in a weekly Bible study. We’ve had a good time this first semester getting to know each other in and out of Bible study and I’m looking forward to seeing them compete this spring.

I’m also excited to be on campus and feel like an experienced staff member. Even with one semester on campus I feel like I know much more than I did when I showed up on campus in August and I’m excited to do some things differently and try some new things.

Go Pirates!

Sojourner

This last weekend I had the unexpected opportunity to go on a bit of a retreat. I found out that I would be going last Thursday and Friday evening I made the trip into New York City. I went with 2 Ramapo College FOCUS missionaries and 5 of their students to St. Crispin's Friary in the Bronx. The Friary is one of the homes of the Community of Franciscan Friar's of the Renewal (the friars are often referred to as CFR's). We were visiting to go on a "Jesus Run" or "Midnight Run", meaning we would preparing some food and then delivering to people living on the streets of New York City. I knew very little about where we would be going in the city but was very excited to experience this.

We arrived around 7:30pm and helped put fresh fruit and vegetables in bags that families in the Bronx are would pick up the next morning. At the same time some other volunteers were making sandwiches and preparing hot chocolate and some hot soup to take the homeless that night. We left the Friary a bit before 9pm in 2 15 passenger vans and a few other vehicles. One van had all the food and drinks and the other had winter clothes and blankets. Our first stop was in what is no dead place in town, the corner of 5th Avenue and 56th Street, across the street from Trump Towers. There is a church on the corner and many people without homes sleep on the steps of the church surrounding and protecting themselves with only cardboard boxes.

I spoke to a woman on the steps with one of the friars, she had a very interesting story. She had worked on Wall Street in the last year, but her husband died in August and left her nothing and thus she ended up on the streets with only her dog. She was very appreciative of the hot chocolate, winter hat, and rosary that we offered her. We prayed with her and left. I as was leaving I noticed some people stopped on the sidewalk watching in awe as about 30 of us moved around bringing sandwiches, soup, and hot chocolate to these people in boxes.

I walked back to the vans and found a woman standing there with an empty cup, I asked her if she would like some more hot chocolate and showed her to the van. Once we were there another volunteer asked the woman if she needed anything else, she asked if we had any clothes. I showed her to the other van and she asked for some pants. I asked her how long she had been on the streets, she explained to me that she had only been out there for a month or two after spending some time living in the subway, but left. She also told me and a bit surprised herself how much peace she has found in living on the streets, she said it is much less stressful and dramatic than living in a shelter. I was surprised and she agreed that it may sound a bit "backwards". She then asked about the group I was with, asking if we were religious. I pointed out the friars to her and then said that the rest of us were volunteers. Then I offered her a rosary but she said that she's not religious. She then asked what I was doing there, I had mentioned to her earlier that I worked at Seton Hall. I told her that I was a missionary and she was surprised, she'd only heard of missionaries going to other countries.

At this point, since she had mentioned that she had a lack of belief in God, I wanted to witness to her somehow of the faith of mine and that of the people I was with. She asked me, still surprised at what I do, what is the most difficult part of my job. I told her that it would probably be to continually trust in God to provide for me to work for FOCUS, I explained to her how my friends and family contribute so that I can serve at Seton Hall. At this point she was very surprised and impressed, she looked at me and said, "I want to help you, let me give you something." She reached into her pocket and I laughed saying, "I'm not going to take money from you?!" She said that a woman had given $10 to her and her friend earlier and they split it. She pulled out a few crumpled bills and placed them in my hand. Shocked I did not know what to say. Finally I said, "Thanks you soo much." She said you're welcome. I told her that I would be praying for her. I asked her to pray for me also and she said that she would be. I hugged her and left.

As I was headed into the city I sent a text message to a few people asking them to pray for me that night, for my safety and warmth. After I talked to this woman, Sojourner, I sent another text to those people asking them to not pray for me, but pray for the people on the streets. I couldn't believe how selfish I had been. The weekend was full of great moments and a lot of prayer, but no moment impacted me quite like it did with my new friend Sojourner.

I ask that you say a quick prayer when you read this for Sojourner. She was a legal assistant and willingly left her job, thinking that she would find something else. But she is in a program where she will be sending out some resumes, so please keep her in your prayers.

And also pray that we may all be as loving and willing to give as Sojourner this Christmas season.

God Bless you.

At request of Papa

About one month ago I came up with the “Beards for Breath” idea. I wasn’t quite sure what the response would be or if people would even want to take part in it. Well only a few weeks into the event hundreds of people said that they would be uniting in my prayer for lives of the unborn. And I’m sure it made a difference.

This past month I have prayed so intentionally for an end to abortion. This past month of prayer has been an emotional one for me, I have been in tears and I have rejoiced. I’ve been In tears because if you have a heart and you think about what abortion is and what it does to a person or family..... are you supposed to be happy? I rejoiced after this: about halfway through the month someone asked me to pray for a girl that her 16 year old sister knew at school. The girl was pregnant and asked a friend to take her to an abortion clinic, but the friend said no. (Praise Jesus!) But the friend that said no was worried that the girl would ask someone else to take her. It was at this point that I learned about this girl and asked the “Beards for Breath” group to pray specifically for this girl and her unborn child. About a week later I learned that the girl that was pregnant had since asked her friend that refused to take her to the clinic to be with her when she told her parents that she is pregnant and that she wanted to keep the child!!! (Thanks be to God!!)

About this same time of the month I learned that Pope Benedict XVI called for a worldwide day of prayer with the intention being an end to abortion. Certainly he was calling on the Catholic Church, but really the invitation was to everyone with a pro-life passion. The day was yesterday 11/27/10 and Pope Benedict began the Advent season by celebrating a solemn “Vigil for all nascent human life” at St. Peter’s Basilica.

Yesterday I thought about this day Pope Benedict called for and thought about how neat it is that the entire Catholic Church was praying for the same intention yesterday. I thought about this especially when I prayed my rosary last night. Saturday the mysteries of the rosary are the Joyful mysteries, there are 5.

1.The Annunciation of Gabriel unto Mary. (LK 1:30-38)
2.Mary’s Visitation to Elizabeth (LK 1:39-45)
3.The birth of Jesus (LK 2:1-7)
4.The presentation of Jesus in the Temple (LK 2:22-24)
5.The finding of Jesus in the Temple (LK 2:41-51)

To those unfamiliar with the rosary: it is a devotion to the Blessed Mother of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Virgin Mary. We reflect on moments in the life of Mary and Jesus while reciting the Hail Mary. Tonight it was more special to pray this than usual. I offered the intention of praying my rosary last night for an end to abortion and for the lives of the unborn not realizing that I would soon enter into prayer while contemplating the single greatest pro-life moment in the world. That moment when Mary, a virgin was told she would conceive a child, but instead of taking her fate and the fate of the child into her own hands, she simply said YES to life. Then Mary visits Elizabeth and Elizabeth recognizes her as blessed and finally Mary gives birth to Jesus.

From the beginning life has been a gift from God and although we may not have planned a pregnancy, God has. And even when we think we may have “planned” a pregnancy, God knew even before conception of that child.

I feel there is nothing coincidental about the timing of Pope Benedict’s call out to Pro-lifers to unite yesterday in prayer. Last evening as the official beginning of the Advent season we need to pray for more than an end to abortion and for the gift of life, but we need to pray for and prepare for the most important birth in the history of the world, a birth that we will celebrate in just 27 days. Are you ready?

The Devil hates Beards

Monday morning, like any other morning I left my apartment, hopped in my truck, and drove to school. I arrived, got out of my truck and started to walk away when I noticed something strange on my bumper. I have 4 stickers on the back of my truck, 2 U of WI Eau Claire, 1 Green Bay Packers and one that reads "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you." Jeremiah 1:5 ProlifeWisconsin.org. One of these stickers was partially torn this morning. Any guesses as to which one? It looks like an animal took a bite out of the corner of it, certainly something that was carefully done, not just by chance or nature.

As I walked to campus with a few coworkers I shared with them what had happened. After a short pause I told them, "the devil hates my beard." And there is no doubt that this month the devil hates beards being grown for "Beards for Breath," and if he hates it, that can only mean that Someone else loves it. Did you ever think that a beard or prayers for beards (thanks ladies!) would bring glory to God?

If Jesus has a plan for us before we are formed in the womb, wouldn't satan want that plan derailed before one was out of the womb? Satan loves to see souls ruined in the womb, or out, and Jesus loves to see souls, that He has created, come into the world moving closer to a relationship with Him and closer to bringing Him glory.

And this month with a lot of prayer, a little sacrifice and suffering our beards are bringing glory to God and saving souls and lives.

So persevere through the discomfort and itchiness because not only does satan hate it, but Jesus loves it.

Amen.

Spirtual Warfare

My previous post is a message to the Beards for Breath group and it talks about something that has been on my mind a lot lately, spiritual warfare and present the devil is everyday. Yes, he's as present as Jesus is everywhere we go and as Jesus wants us to be loving and glorify Him in the things we do, the devil wants the opposite, and he wants it bad.

A few weeks ago I had the privilege of listening to Fr. John Corapi. A priest for about 20 years now and a man that has experienced the good and the bad and life more than the average person. Fr. John's presentation was in Newark, NJ at the Prudential Center, home of the New Jersey Nets, Seton Hall Pirates, and the New Jersey Devils. Fr. John began his presentation by coming on stage wearing a Devils jersey and with a hockey stick, the brand/model of the hockey stick was "Warrior". I'm not sure how much of that was intentional but pretty ironic isn't it? I mean a Catholic priest wearing the "devil" with a hockey stick labeled warrior!! Fr. John said, "I've never seen a homeless person, alcoholic, or drug addict that doesn't believe in the devil." Adding that these people (like most) are often stuck between the devil & God. Fr. John at one point in his life was all of those things he mentioned, homeless, alcoholic and drug addict. Thankfully he turned out ok and is doing great things now.

Fr. pointed our direction to Ephesians 6:10-17, which I invite you read here:

http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Ephesians%206:10-17&version=NASB

This passage talks about putting on the armor of God and standing firm against the devil. Fr. John said, "St. Paul (the writer of Ephesians) tells us to put on the WHOLE armor of God, not the parts we want. If there's a hole in our armor, the devil is a good shot, he will wound you."

Being on a college campus and facing my own confrontations as a Christian with the devil everyday I can tell you that devil is very real. Everyday I am faced with decisions to make that will either bring glory to God or please the devil and I don't always make the right decision. The beauty is that as Christians we can repent, move on, and try to do it better the next time. The devil hates the beauty of Christ and the life offered to Christians through Christ's death. The devil wants us to make a mistake, feel bad about it, let it get us down, and for us to stay down, even to depression. Everything that is good, the devil hates.

So let's put on the armor of God and help those around us become better equipped to stand up to the devil and more importantly bring Glory to God in all that we do.